Vampires and Guys with Snake Tattoos w/ Saro
PRIDE
PRIDE

Episode · 1 year ago

Vampires and Guys with Snake Tattoos w/ Saro

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Today we’re talking with Saro, spelled s-a-r-o, an LA-based R&B-pop artist. Saro, AKA Evan Windom, is an independent artist who’s moody tracks live up to his name as he belts out lyrics like “love is pain.” Recently, Saro began to openly sing about the men he has dated. Like his recent single, “Daddy I Love Him.” But before he was proudly using male pronouns in his songs, he was using vague lyrics to hide his sexuality. It’s a fear a lot of musicians have. That they’ll lose fans if they don’t conform and sing songs about the opposite sex. But Saro found a way to live authentically and now writes songs about vampires and guys with snake tattoos without a second thought.

Be sure to follow Saro on IG! Your host is Levi Chambers, co-founder of Gayety. Follow the show and keep up with the conversation @Pride. Want more great shows from Straw Hut Media? Check out or website at strawhutmedia.com. Your producers are Levi Chambers, Maggie Boles, Ryan Tillotson and Edited by Silvana Alcala. Have an interesting LGBTQ+ story to share? We might feature U! Email us at lgbtq@strawhutmedia.com. *This podcast is not affiliated with Pride Media. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode of pride is presented by atnt Straw media. Today we're talking with sorrow, spelled Saar O and La based RNB pop artist. Sorrow, Aka Evan Wyndham, is an independent artist whose moody tracks live up to his name as he belts out lyrics like love is pain. Recently, sorrow began to openly sing about the men he has dated, like his recent single daddy. I love him. But before he was proudly using male pronouns and his songs he was using vague lyrics to hide his sexuality. It's a fear a lot of musicians have that they'll somehow lose fans if they don't conform and sing songs about the opposite sex. But sorrow found a way to live authentically and now write songs about Vampires and guys with snake tattoos without a second thought. I'm sorrow and this is pride. Before sorrow came out of the closet about his sexuality, he had to come out of another closet first. Growing up, I was a closet singer, like literally know knew I could sing. My family kind of knew because they would hear me. He was very confident in his music and usually only showed off his vocals at home. They would try to record me without me knowing, but when they tried to like get me to sing in front of other people, I'd be like, leave me alone, I'm playing starcraft or whatever. While most of us are probably notorious for belting out a Christina Aguilera Song in the shower, sorrows harmless singing went a little beyond that. Sometimes would come up with melodies and stuff. He would later learn that music has been part of him since before he was born. While I was in my mother's womb, she was in the recording studio all the time working on a project. I knew that she had made music, but I didn't know that it was while she's pregnant with me. So finding that out, I was like, Oh, okay, this makes sense. It was something he was really passionate about, yet he didn't see music as a potential career. I kind of was always too afraid to pursue anything in music. I didn't think that it was something that was possible for me. But the music industry isn't an easy career path. It's competitive and intimidating, which caused sorrow to have a lot of doubts. I think it was just like how grandiose the industry felt like as a kid watching it on TV, and you know I was a huge music fan, but I was like that's them and this is me and I can never achieve that, and I just like that's like way too big and flashy and insane for me to even think that I can achieve anything like that. His dream for a career in music didn't even originate until high school, where he met a young artist named Simone battle. She and I became really close and she kind of brought out of...

...me. She like we were drinking one night and I started singing with her and she's like, Oh my God, you could sing. So she forced me to go to recording studio with her. kind of brought it out of me and this second I was in the studio I was like this is where I need to be from now on. I loved it so much. I guess he needed to go back to where his mom had started it all, a recording studio. Even after finding sanctuary and the recording studio, sorrow's fear of the music industry didn't fade away because, on top of worrying if he had what it takes to make it. He also had to worry about being gay and would that affect his career. There were people in my life that knew that I was, you know, Queer and they told me not to tell the people I was working with, and that, you know, was a lot and made me kind of like receipt further into the closet when it came to the industry, because I was afraid that people wouldn't want to work with me or like I would get pigeonholed sorrow. Tried to fit the mold of a stereotypical male singer. He left his songs vague so that even his friends and family wouldn't know who or what he was singing about. Yeah, I definitely would write in shroud. I guess I would say like just kind of hide things in between the lines, which I love, like all my favorite artist, most of my favorite artist, right in like this poetic way where you it's kind of like their double meanings, and so that's kind of I would like. I little secrets in the music, but yeah, so that people couldn't figure out exactly what I was saying, or they could speculate, but they wouldn't know for sure. But sorrow didn't want to hide who he was from the world, so he came out. Once I did come out, it was honestly the opposite effect, where it was like people were like amazing, we love you like even more now. And you know, once I was authentic to myself a little more, I really found the people that I wanted to work with and that like wanted to work with me. For me, sorrows authenticity went into his songwriting too. He was a male artist singing about liking men, which didn't seem like a big deal, but it is. I try to be as honest as possible when writing now. Definitely use male pronouns when talking about love interests, and you know, I think that it just makes it more authentic and true, and I think that that's the best place to write from, because then you actually can stand behind your art. There are so many amazingly talented lgbtq plus artist right now in the world that sometimes it's hard for me to choose who to listen to in the car. Recently on the podcast we've had guests like country singer Brook Eden and singer and Rapper Taddrek Hall speak on their successful careers. So maybe there's hope for the industry after all. I do feel like the industry is changing absolutely. I think it's changing very rapidly now. Yeah, even like two...

...years ago it was different than it is now. I feel like it really is about your talent and you know how you put yourself out there, and I still feel like you can get a little bit boxed in if you like come out a certain way, but I think that the community is just like receptive to like really supporting artists that are lgbtq plus. So I mean I think it's I think it's definitely changing. I think there's still like a little bit of stigma, but for the most part I love the direction we're headed in. It's like a it's like a double coming out right. You have to come out with as an artist and then as a person, and then in your music and then to the world, into your friends and your family, to becomes d every new person is a new closet that it is erected everyone you meet. Yeah, it took a while for sorrow to feel ready to come out to his dad and my dad and I have a great relationship. Early on. He was one of the like there were some problematic things said that made me kind of like stay in the closet for a couple more years that, you know, I would have been out, and then when I finally came out to him, he was just like the sweetest you're still my sonny go and I love you. Gave me a hug and I like blacked out the whole moment. But we're super close now and it was his relationship with his dad that inspired one of his newest singles, Daddy, I love him. There was one boy that he just could not stand. So we have to address the fact that the song is a slight reference to Disney's the little mermaid, where Ariel throws a fit when Daddy Triton won't let her date the human. So yeah, I mean the line is very obviously a little mermaid nod. When I was writing it, it wasn't so much about that. The song has less to do with mermaids and more to do with snakes. The first line I wrote was he has a snake tattooed on his face, which is very specific to a person that I dated who, after I wasn't dating them anymore, who I'm still friends with now. By the way, he got a tattoo on his face of a snake and it's pretty intense. But like that, I think I just found out that he got that Tattoo. So I like wrote that line and then it was like, but, Daddy, I love him kind of like no matter what kind of how like dark or twisted or, you know, undtable someone is, if you love them, you have to like stand up to your parents or stand up to whoever and be proud of who you're dating. So that was kind of like the concept. So how did Sorrows Dad react to the song? When I first played the song for my dad, though, he was like hey, like I always accept everything, but he didn't accept the boy that he was dating, at least not at the time. The Guy didn't have a snake tattoo on his face yet, but that doesn't mean there weren't a...

...few red flags for the parents. I think that there was some discomfort with like if I was staying at my dad's and like I would want him to come stay with us and then like him like walking around kind of like he owned the place and like eating food and cooking food and like being shirtless in the kitchen, like that kind of stuff. You know, I think that there was some homophobia like in that buried in there, you know, because it was one of the first people that, like, I had around a lot. I don't like to use that word when referring to my dad because he's come such a long way, but anyway, it's like the bad boy, right, like, no, not that one, not the one with the motorsyball. Yeah, bad boy. Yeah, but also a lot of newness, you know. Yeah, absolutely. I think a lot of parents go through that. Sorrow is working on an album, but he's released two singles in the last month, Daddy, I love him, and boy tears. Boy Tears is about a vampire who's addicted to making boys cry, basically. So, yeah, I mean it. I'm just like having fun with it. We've been in a pandemic for over a year and it's safe to say it's been tough for a lot of us. Sorrow wanted his new music to be brighter and happier to counteract all the darkness of the current world. So obviously that means vampires. Most of the time. I was like, let me just write something that's fun and that I in like you know, enjoy the process and not get too deep. So yeah, it's very queer inspired. There are there are some relationship moments, some darkness, but yeah, for the most part it's fun and light. When I ask what a surreal moment in their career has been, most artists I speak to answer with an anecdote about playing to one of their biggest live audiences, because it's crazy to see so many people. They're listening to you right. But on the other hand, there's something so special about playing to an intimate audience like out of college show, because the students are just so happy to have you and like so into what you're doing and you just feel so connected and so close. So my favorite show ever was at a college in organ. It was like a Friday night everyone, you know, it's like on the outskirts. So people were just so excited to like have someone in town performing. They all like listen to the music before if they didn't know who I was. So like everyone knew the words and I got down into the audience and like how to you know, wireless mic and everyone surrounded me and it was just like the most beautiful moment and that was that was definitely like the highlight of my performance career so far. When we come back, how sorrow got his...

...name, cyber bullying and new music. This episode of pride is presented by ATNT. Are you part of the next generation of LGBTQ plus leaders? Then I want you to enter the ATNT turn up the love grant contest. You could receive a twenty fivezero dollar grant and an incredible mentorship experience to help you increase your impact. Now until October thirty one, all you have to do is upload a video and a facebook, twitter or instagram explaining how you're a community advocate who is working to advance our quality and safety for Lgbtq plus youth, how you're taking a stand or how you turn up the love for the LGBTQ plus community. And don't forget to tag a TNT AT ATT Hashtag turn up the love and Hashtag ATT contest. I'll be checked in to see some of those video entries, so you better follow those rules and go to http pull and lash turn up the lovecom grant contest to learn more about the official rules. Welcome back. Today we're talking to sorrow, an alt RMB pop artist who's been delivering danceable beats. Since two thousand and sixteen, before the break sorrow, said, he had to come out of multiple closets to embrace his true self, and thanks to his friend Simone, he was able to truly discover his love for music, and so it seems only fitting that when he lost her, he turned to music again. When my friend Simone passed away, who I referred to earlier, who basically got me into music, she passed away in two thousand and fourteen and that was the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with in my entire life. And there was one album I kept going back to just to like numb everything and make me feel okay, and it was pair cos them by washed out. That album was just like the wind beneath my wings, like it just was the only thing that made me feel okay. So I have reached out to to wash out and just kind of like let him know, and it felt good to let him know that that like saved me in that time of neat. And then the other it was just like when I was dealing with coming out and like the uncertainty of my sexuality. In those teen years I discovered the Smiths Morsee, who you know, is kind of an asshole and I would never want to meet him, but that music really resonated with me. I like read between the lines and kind of felt like very kindred with what he was saying and...

...it made me feel solidarity with Being Queer and like not knowing you know what to do next. Yeah, and that's my my name actually originates from a Smith Song, so obviously one of my favorites. After Simone passed, sorrow completely shut down. The only reason he ever left his house at all was because his mom would drag him to gatherings. So I would go out to dinners and there would be photos being taken and I wouldn't be smiling the photos because I was just so depressed. So my mom was like, you never smile, you never smile, you never smile. And then I was listening to one of my favorite songs by the Smiths, which is called pretty girls make graves, which, like, I resonate so deeply with. But in the song he says and sorrows native son, he will not smile for anyone. And so when I was you know, I went by Evan mellows before I went by sorrow and I knew that I had to scrap everything because I was just not feeling as connected with the music that I was going to put out. So I scrapped it all and I started writing this new music. And when I heard that song I wrote down the word sorrow, just spelled, you know, Sorow, and it stayed on my list of like possible names just and then I just changed the spelling and it stuck, but I remembered that that's where that word came from. So if you were curious where sorrow came from, now you know. I wish sorrow was my born name. That would be awesome. In addition to the music community, sorrow is also a huge Gamer. I'm a blizzard boy day day one blizzard boy, like starcraft, warcraft, world of Warcraft, all that, all that good stuff. He even played an early Beta version of League of legends and that probably made his entire year and I had a friend who worked in each o there and I got to go visit the grounds and it was like the most amazing day ever. But yeah, I love I'm such a Gamer, I love everything, all right. So you get it. He's a big Fan, but a lot of people have actually quit gaming because the community is so riddled with homophobia. Many games have an online component where you get to interact with other players, which basically means cyber bullying is inevitable. You here so many slurs, like every other word out of Gamer's mouth, I'm assuming non Queer Gamers, you know, and Word F word. It's just like thrown back and forth. It's very triggering and I just have gone to the point where, like, I remove myself from situation. I don't engage anymore. I used to, but but yeah, it's a toxic landscape out there and you just have to you know, for me at least, I just have like for my own saying the I just have to not be a part of...

...that. If I if there's someone who I'm playing with that is, you know, speaking that way, I'll mute them. I will, you know, move on. But yeah, it's a hard it's a hard world when there's no consequence to you know, you can just hide buy in your computer or your console and say whatever you want. He says his best piece of advice for those who are struggling with online cyber bullying is to not let it get to you and to shut it down. I'm like zero tolerance policy. If someone comes in my comments sideways, I will block them. I would delete you know, I'll I try not to waste my energy retorting anymore. Sometimes I'll do it, but for the most part you just, you know, find that inner strength and keep kicking, you know, which is really great advice. It can feel so easy to just give in and fight back at bullies online, but in the end it never really pays off much. You just have to like trust in your community and like find your community and find your people and like gain the strength from them and realize that, like you're not alone, they're like many people out there, and just find strength and solve this in that and this mindset of blocking out the haters is how sorrow also handles Bullis in his music community. So I just whenever I get sidetracked with some hate or something like, I just try to snap out of it as quickly as possible, but I do give myself like a good twenty four hours. I'm like, all right, you have twenty four hours to mourn this or twenty five four hours to feel this, but then you know you got to let go and move on, and I think that there have been times where reactions have made me slow down or take breaks, but then I, you know, compose myself and realize that literally creating is what saved my life, like making music and putting music out is what saved my life. And every time someone, you know, says to me that what I'm doing has saved their life or help them in some way, it makes it so important to me that I keep going. Whenever anyone like reaches out to me to say that I've helped them, you know, overcome a breakup or, you know, suppress some of their darker thoughts. Maybe not suppressed, but like get over some dark thoughts, because, you know, some of my music is like deals with really heavy subjects, lost heartbreak. So you know, I've been at shows. It's not really the moments where I'm on stage, it's like the offstage moments where someone takes me the side and says like Hey, like that song really got me through a tough time, like that song saved my life. That song, you know, helped my relationship or helped me get out of a toxic relationship. Those are really the moments...

...that make me feel like I'm should be doing what I'm doing. Lah has been under very strict shutdown since the beginning of the pandemic. So a lot of us have been using our free time to take up crafts, big banana bread, maybe get some deep cleaning done. But for sorrow, his time was spent honing in on some of his music skills. I definitely picked up a couple new skills. I got a little better at piano, which is great. I wasn't comfortable playing piano while singing before the pandemic and now I am, and that's such a blessing. I've definitely feel like I've been able to write more and become more selfsufficient when it comes to creating music. But there were a lot of dark lulls where I was just like, I have no inspiration and no motivation. So yeah, I came in waves, but overall I'm really happy that I did have time and space to like create in this new way. And now he's already released two singles leading up to his first full length album that should come out later this year, and he has a few of the projects up his sleeve, just visuals, collaborations, some side projects and hopefully a tour early next year. Live music has been slowly coming back so we'll keep our fingers crossed that at some point we can all go to a sorrow tour soon, but until then you can stream of music and all screaming platform was just search for sorrow Sauro, Instagram at Sa r O, ticktock, which I'm very new too, at Sare, oh, twitter, at only sorrow. Pride is a production of Straw hunt media. If you like the show, leave us a reading and review on Apple, podcast, spotify or wherever you're tuning in from. Then follow us on Instagram, facebook and twitter at pride and tuning weekly for new episodes. Be Sure to share this episode with your friends and subscribe for more stories from Amazing Queer people. If you'd like to connect with me, you can follow me everywhere. At Lea by chambers. Pride is produced by me LEA by chambers, Maggie Bolls, Bryan Tillotson and Caitlyn mcdaniel, edited by Silvana, I'll Calla, and Daniel Ferreira. Sound mixing by Silvana, I'll call up right. I forget what that saying is. That like light comes from the darkest Toaxy, I think. I think they say it in Harry Potter too. That's...

...probably where it comes from. Me that sounds like a very dumbledore thing to say. It's absolutely dumbledore.

In-Stream Audio Search

NEW

Search across all episodes within this podcast

Episodes (147)